During class this week our instructor quoted the great Theodore Roosevelt, who said, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” and it really resonated with me, especially as I begin this journey. As I walked into the Core Power studio for my first week of Yoga Teacher Training I felt terrified and intimidated, I literally almost puked. I was thinking to myself I had no business being there. Spinning stories in my head like, “I’m not skinny enough, not young enough, not enough of a yogi, others want and deserve it more, I’m not good enough at yoga, what am I even doing here.” I found myself looking at everyone else in the room and admiring their form, their confidence, their strength and bodies and comparing them to mine, which I told myself over and over again wasn’t enough. But while flowing I allowed this quote to really sink in, and it hit me. I was letting my own comparisons and doubt steal my joy and take away from this amazing journey. In all actuality, I met people in training of all different ages, shapes, sizes, backgrounds, experience levels, and reasons why. Was I the worst one there? I have no idea because for me the beauty of yoga is that I let everything outside of my breath and body go for an hour. It was almost an outer body experience as I revisited feelings of gratitude instead of judgement and comparison. I remembered how grateful I am to be alive, to move, to grow, and to have this opportunity. So heading into week 2, this is the mindset I’m cultivating. It won’t be perfect but it’s something to grow with and practice because I want and deserve to feel joy. Heading into week 2 feeling a little stronger, a little braver, and open to all the experiences coming my way.
Megan